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If You Really Loved Me, You'd Kill the Lizardmen

from The Homemade Demo by Giant Baby

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lyrics

You tell me that you love me
that you'll always have my back
but will you stay here with me
when the Lizardmen attack?
Crawling from the murky swamps
to challenge our romance
Can I count on you to ride shotgun,
or will you scream and shit your pants?

Mortgages and babies never scared you away
But when we fight the Lizardmen, will you join the fray?
Marriage is conditional, or it don't mean a thing
If you can't fight off a reptile, then you don't get a ring

The Doktor's got his shotgun,
Captain's got his battle axe
Johnny's got a cannon
And Charlie brought his gat
Giant Baby's packin' action
And there's a gun for you
Will you stay and save the city
or run crying to your room?

Mortgages and babies never scared you away
But when we fight the Lizardmen, will you join the fray?
Marriage is conditional, or it don't mean a thing
If you can't fight off a reptile, then you don't get a ring

Baby are you gonna stay or go? Because ever since George Washington's army teamed up with the Navajo and the Cherokee and chased those Lizardmen abominations back into the murky Okefenokee swamp, they've been waiting for us to grow complacent and weak and take back the nation. So I want you to shoot the first Lizardman you see right in the face, and take your biggest kitchen knife and scrape off his skin and turn that scaly Lizardman skin into boots and a belt and a coat and wear your Lizardmanskin boots into battle so that when they see you they know you're not fucking around, now can you do that for me, baby?

Mortgages and babies never scared you away
But when we fight the Lizardmen, will you join the fray?
Marriage is conditional, or it don't mean a thing
If you can't fight off a reptile, then you don't get a ring

credits

from The Homemade Demo, released May 1, 2008
Lyrics by Doktor Heisenberg
Music Composed by Captain Fun
Performed by Giant Baby

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